September 15, 2014

Day 6:

I haven't always had the best luck with boys. And since my past is currently on my mind, that is what I am going to post about today. My past relationships have been with some really crappy guys. I have been cheated on time after time. Lied to. Used. Ect. And I am way over it. My ex texted me last night and asked if he could come over. I had to say no. but in all reality, I kinda wish he had. I miss him but at the same time, he is an ex for a reason. He cheated on me, and then denied it to me and told my brother he really cheated on me 6 times. My other ex he and i were together a year. and I loved him with everything I have. He lived a ways away so we only saw eachother on skype and stuff. we used to have netflix dates. It was cute. But then he cheated on me, Now he has a kid with some girl who texted him and said " hey you have a kid, hes a month old and I don't want him. you can keep him or give him up." We talk alot. we are just friends though. That little boy has become my whole world. I love him so much. I love both alot. but I don't know if we will ever be again. 
I guess all im trying to say is the past is the past for a reason right? maybe it should stay in the past. and I know I deserve better. Its taken me a long time to realize that but im glad I have.